Why Do We Sing That Stupid Neil Diamond Song During Every Sporting Event?
Sweet Caroline is not as sweet as she used to be. U2 put that song into their live show in 1997 at Soldier Field. That was cool. Now, it's just worn out. But, I feel obligated to sing it at every live event in this town. Luckily the mic I was next to wasn't turned on...
Neil Diamond is great. Let's just all admit that now. I'm not anti-Neil. I mean, how many times have you spent a long night in the basement after a bad date and played "Love on the Rocks" on a loop? It's healing and therapeutic. The man brings heartache into focus and allows us to disseminate the pain gradually so we can deal...and come up out of the fetal position, walk back upstairs and eat some Twinkies & Doritos. But this Caroline person has had enough "Da Da Da's" in American sports facilities.
I will suck it up and sing along again this weekend when the Iowa Barnstormers make their first appearance in our town for the Saturday night's "Iowa Bowl." Maybe we could change the sing-along to "Stranded In Iowa" [with Utah license plates].
Or, better yet, how about Anna Molly? She's a more upstanding citizen than Caroline, and has a better cadence - "Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do...."
I'll talk our music Man Adam Kokontis and ask if he can serve up a warm audio bowl of "Love On The Rocks." After we shred the Barnstormers we can put it on in the 4th quarter and dedicate it to the City of Des Moines.
"Just pour me a drink and I'll tell you some lies."